After not seeing her for some time I messaged my longstanding (or should that be long suffering? 😂) psychologist chasing up a contact. Much to my astonishment she rang & left a voice message along the lines of, “Great to hear from you, I often think of you and would love an update if you want to call me back.” So I did.
I mean this was an unmistakable demonstration of care.
More than that, it potently evoked a sense in me of mattering.
And in this instance, mattering in the mind and crazy busy world of this exquisite professional with decades of experience and oodles of clients.
And well it made my day, my week, my month… & reminded me all over again why I choose her.
The construct of ‘Mattering’ is making the headlines in health right now. It’s being proposed as the missing piece of the mental wellness puzzle psychologists have constructed around other identified important elements, such as, self-esteem, social-connectedness and resilience. But many real barriers block or impair access to one or more of these for some. Think about individuals affected by social disadvantage and the inherent inequity then in the ‘resilience’ asked of them. Another example could be people who are neuro-divergent and might therefore struggle with social connection. Mattering in its most simple terms is the sense that we matter.
“Mattering is the personal sense of feeling significant and valued by other people.
The person who feels like he or she matters is someone who feels important, visible…Mattering is a vital construct and a key psychological resource that is central to the human condition; indeed, the individual person who lives his or her life devoid of a sense of mattering to others will lack the basic sense of personal significance, human connectedness, and social acceptance required to thrive and flourish. In contrast, the person who feels a persistent sense of mattering unconditionally to significant others will have a key inner resource that fuels positive responses to life challenges. That is, a clear sense of mattering can buffer various life stressors.”
Flett 2022
So this year I’ve embraced two new(ish) potent therapeutic modalities: mattering & active hope, & building up a sense of both in anyone I engage with. I spoke at two conferences on the latter, which has now been identified as an essential element of positive outcomes from any health intervention. I think both are things that are at the heart of naturopathic care but in all the clutter, confusion and chaos of biochemical pathways, nutrigenomics, testing & yet more testing, spruiking to socials for our survival etc. they may have been a little lost amongst the noise. But perhaps now as we prepare to take a break and spend more time resting and reflecting we can take a moment to contemplate how our patients’ sense of ‘mattering’ adds to any other medicine we might have prescribed🤗
